The End is Only the Beginning

Sitting at the Tucson airport waiting for my flight, I noticed the Italian airline attendant speaking to a young woman and trying to explain to her in Spanish that our flight would be boarding soon and how to know when her group was being called. I had just moved out of our house in Douglas that morning, and waiting at the airport gave me space to reflect more on my completed time on mission in Arizona and Agua Prieta, Mexico. Will I remember long-term these things that I have learned? I know I am grateful for this incredible opportunity, and I feel fulfilled in my decision to leap and discover what God had in store for me on the US-Mexico border. How has this experience changed me? What habits, values, and mindsets will I take with me into future chapters so that it’s not all erased with time?

Upon arriving at our destination (my layover), the same young woman and I made eye contact and smiled. I caught sight of her blue mesh “Five Below” bag that all guests at the Tucson migrant center are given. As we all boarded a bus that – I assumed – would shuttle us to the terminal, she appeared to be nervous. I asked her where she was from (Colombia) and started chatting with her about the little that I knew about her country from my Colombian friends. She shared with me that this was her first time traveling alone and asked me where they were taking us. I did my best to calm her nerves as, I admitted to her, I was also navigating this airport for the first time. With very little time to catch my connecting flight, I was not able to accompany her in finding the airport exit. Instead, we went up to an airport attendant to ask for directions – there were no helpful signs anywhere – and I translated his instructions for her on how to get out of the airport.

We parted ways and, to my surprise, I almost immediately started crying! During the weeks of packing, cleaning, saying goodbyes, and working out the logistics of leaving, I had been unable to feel much at all. Now all of a sudden, I was feeling… something. As I tried to gather myself, I realized that I was grieving the letting go of this chapter of my life. I have thoroughly enjoyed getting to use old and new skills to support people in their frightening and chaotic transitions to life in the US, and yet I feel that it is time to move on to something else that is still a question mark for me. 

It seemed to me that God had this young Colombian woman and myself cross paths on purpose; I helped her feel comfortable and get to where she needed to go, and she helped me realize how far I’ve come in this time on mission. In a little under three years, I’ve developed the courage to step out of my comfort zone to help others in a language that is not my own in order to provide a sense of welcome and care when they are far from home. My hope is that these skills are not lost over time and that I can discover a new path that allows me to continue walking beside those in vulnerable situations. 

Looking at the beauty and joy in this chapter that’s closing, the end is heavy for me – and points to excitement and wonder at the unknown vistas ahead.

Question for Reflection: How do you process change? How can you carry the lessons, skills, and memories forward with you?